Since I’ll bet you're curious about what the easily promoted rockstars do that distinguishes them from everyone else, I'm going to share one of their secrets with you. It has to do with getting and using really honest feedback. I’ll also leave you with five scripts that will help you more easily and confidently request actionable feedback.

One of the things I had to do when I was responsible for Diversity and Inclusion was to really figure out how the promotion process really worked.

What I learned was that there's a promotion committee. They put the candidates being considered for promotion into three groups: definite yes, maybe, and definite no. The committee doesn’t spend any time on those considered definite no. They spend very little time on the definite yes candidates. They spend most of their time arguing, negotiating and jockeying around the maybes and figuring out who's getting through and who is not.

My question was: What is it about the definite...

Strengthening your ability to request and graciously receive direct feedback to build your awareness of your strengths and weaknesses will serve you well as you work to expand your career possibilities. The key is to have an open and honest dialogue with your manager and other stakeholders to ensure clarity about how you are perceived.

I interviewed a variety of Financial Services executives and HR colleagues about how and why people do or do not get promoted to more senior levels. Some of the perspectives they offered behind closed doors might seem a bit harsh. The good news is that by providing transparency about the tough reality, they help us to take actions to navigate the scene with aplomb.

In seeking examples of those who sailed through the system well and those who did not, there were many mentions of promising performers who were passed over for promotion and didn’t know why.

“...was behind others -- has never been given feedback to understand why...